For those that are close to me know how much of a rollercoaster my love life has been. Going through breakups with all the ex boyfriends, partners, spouses, etc a divorce, & being a widow, I have always come across new ways to get over them and each time have grown stronger. Even though I loved/cared for each of them differently, a breakup is a breakup and the absence of someone you once cared about always hurts. Many of my friends are going through heartache right now; putting up with things they normally wouldn’t, lowering their standards for love, and losing themselves in the process. Trust me, it’s not worth it and is a complete waste of time. A few of them have asked me, “How do you get over the heartache?”
Here’s a list of things I did to heal myself:
Mediate
Hang out with old friends
Make new friends
Strengthen family bonds
Get better at your job
Take classes
Tend to the hobbies & passions
Road trips
Visit more museums
Picnics at parks
Take fitness classes
Wine tasting
Walking at the track
Pamper myself
Try new foods
Started writing
Get massages
Went out with new people
Never turned down an invitation
Went to local events
Started a business
Bought a house
Saved money
Got to know myself
The trick is KEEP BUSY!!! Get out of bed, throw the box of tissues away, pick yourself up, get dolled up, and do things. Before you know it, time flies by and you’re totally over the prick that broke your heart. These are just the things I can remember off the top of my head. People spend to much time on dwelling about what could have been, what they could have done better, or more of. A lot of times it isn’t YOU…its them. They want their cake and eat it too, they have voids they can’t seem to fulfill, etc. Don’t always think the problem is you, especially if you’re the one that is giving more love, loyalty, and letting your guard down. If the love, respect, & loyalty is not mutual then there’s a problem, plus no one deserves to be treated like shit. Best piece of advice my dad ever gave me as I sat on his lap and cried from my first heartbreak; he said, “Do you think he’s out there crying over you like this? No, he’s not…he’s out there having fun without a care in the world, if he loved you that wouldn’t be happening.” Till this day I have thought about that and it has helped me heal from break ups quickly. My dad was right; while I was miserable, crying, sad, wanted some asshole that didn’t give two shits about me back, he was out there having a grand ol time meeting new people or with someone else. Love isn’t suppose to hurt…it’s suppose to make you feel like you can fly. And if you’re not feeling that way the majority of the relationship, maybe you shouldn’t be in it. Besides…why wait to get your heart broken…it hurts less to just remove yourself from the situation.
April M. Monterrosa is the Owner of The Lil Spa Room , PCA Skin Certified, a Nuskin Skin Care Distributor, Founder of Wonderfully Wise Women, & a Writer for SAXtreme Magazine. Just a simple & Proud Latina from San Antonio, Texas, a Marine Corps wife, Mama of a Dachshund, & a licensed Cosmetologist of 17+ years, blogging about things I love most…Beauty, Love, Life, Spa, Wine, and everything else in between! Check out my Beauty Blog at: lilsparoom.com